You’re a brand new mom and feeling a bit guilty. You have the most incredible little person in your life but for some reason you’re feeling down.
Maybe you had a perfect birth, and have a perfect baby. But… you feel like crap.
Maybe it wasn’t the perfect birth but you still felt pretty good with the outcome. But… now you feel like crap.
Maybe it was an awful triggering birth experience and… you feel like crap.
I’m here to let you know that no matter how your birth went, or how adorable your new little person is, when about day 3 post birth hits you’re likely going to find yourself crying into your eggs at breakfast and your heart will feel so low that it might just fall out.
Guess what! It sucks. But…it’s normal.
The mom guilt?
The egg crying?
The sobbing uncontrollably when you look at your baby’s perfect little face?
Being overwhelmed while watching Masterchef Junior?
This mama slump is commonly known as the baby blues and happens to about 70% of new moms.
Immediately after birth you have a ton of hormones and enzymes coursing through your veins. But when they disappear a few days later, you’re left with the same you that you had before the birth but with a whole lot less sleep and a whole lot more responsibility. So of course you’re bound to hit a few lows.
If it is just the baby blues it should be gone in a few days.
and this is a big BUT
…if it persists longer than a couple weeks. If you feel like you can’t get out of bed. If you’re struggling to get through ‘normal’ life stuff. You could have Post Partum Depression.
While it’s not normal, it is more common than most people realise. (10% of the 70% will end up with PPD) If you’re experiencing any of the following symptoms please speak to your health care provider about it:
- Your sadness or guilt feelings are all consuming – you struggle to find joy in anything and you feel like you are not good enough
- You have lost interest in the things you usually enjoy – sure you might not be able to take a long run like you used to, but if you no longer enjoy non-physical things (reading a book, or cooking for example) you could have Post Partum Depression
- You’re indecisive – struggling to make decisions because you’re too tired or because you don’t care, could be early PPD signs
- You’re worried you won’t be a good mom-you may find yourself doubting your abilities as a mom, and even thinking about leaving your family because you think they might be better off without you.
- Your sleep patterns are different – yes you have a new baby, so sleeping is much more challenging, but if you’re struggling to sleep when the baby sleeps even though you’re lying down OR you find yourself sleeping all. the. time
- You think about harming yourself or your baby
- Appetite and wight loss changes – you might have little to no appetite, or you might be eating constantly. Or maybe you’ve lost or gained a LOT of weight very quickly
There are many signs of depression and if you feel like you are not yourself lately, then there’s no harm in speaking to a professional about it. It might not be Post Partum depression, but either way you will get the help that you need and deserve
I also feel that if you do have Post Partum Depression, that I need to tell you:
- You are not a bad mom for feeling depressed (for what it’s worth, there is literally nothing you could have done to prevent it)
- I am proud of you for managing to do most of life even though you haven’t really felt up to doing any of it.
If you and your new baby are still alive then you deserve a freaking trophy!
Don’t forget that you birthed a baby, from your body. Do you know how strong that makes you?
And on that note, from almost nothing you grew a tiny human that now lives in the outside world. Do you realise how amazing that makes you?
Find someone you can talk to (I’m literally an email away). It’s not going to be easy, but I promise you it is going to be worth it.
Yes, this is more than just the baby blues, but you are more than just a woman now, you’re a mom.
Now get the help that you deserve.
You got this.
You really do.